Tomorrow

Tomorrow will be the start of a very new chapter.  My Dad is moving here to live with me and help me with this transition.  We have lived 2000 miles away from one another for 5 years.  To say that I am excited is a little bit of an understatement.

My Dad is the type of Dad who would and does do anything for his daughters.  He worked a job that payed less but made him more available to us for much of my adolescence.  I don't ever remember him not being there if he said he would be.  He is steady and calm and honest and loving.  He is also fun and funny and adventurous.  When I told him that my ex and I were splitting, the very first thing that he said to me without any hesitation was "Do you want a live in cook and babysitter? I have nothing much going on here and could leave and come back to help you.".  I don't think that I will forget that for as long as I live.  Here I am, 30 years old, and my Dad is still willing to drop everything to make life a little easier for me.  That is the true definition of Father to me.

I can't wait for my daughter to get to know him better. Up until now, he has existed on a computer screen or in a week's long vacation.  Now, she will get to see him daily.  My ex has already talked to her about the things that he hopes my Dad will teach her (like how to play guitar, and basketball, and make gumbo).  I also know that he will be able to go along with whatever kind of relationship my ex and I decide to have.  Much of my strength and calm in this situation I learned from watching him.  He and my Mom split when I was 10, but remained friends and supportive.  At one point, my Dad not only worked for my step-father, but decided to buy a house with him so that they could all live together and help one another and keep our family together.  That is such a strong testament to the Man that he is and the reason that I want so badly for my ex and I to remain a family.  Even in the earlier days of my split from my ex, my Dad assured me that he would follow my lead however I needed him to.  However my ex and I chose to handle our relationship going forward, he would be fine with.

Beyond the fact that I get to see my Dad everyday, he has already made it clear that he will make himself available for me.  At night, when I start dating again or even just trying to meet new people, he is perfectly fine to stay home with my daughter and let me have some time to myself.  Since my ex and I have not figured out any kind of visitation schedule, this will be huge.  I haven't had much time to myself since I moved out and I am truly looking forward to it.  Beyond going out, I can stay in and hang with him! I won't have to face the occasional loneliness anymore.  He will be there to talk to.  My therapist has warned me not to let him take the place that my husband once filled emotionally, so I will be making sure I am mindful of that.

Wish us luck. No doubt it will be a big transition for all.  He hasn't had a three year old in his house since 2008.  It may take a little time to work out the kinks, but I am so grateful and so excited to have him here.